THOUGHTS- a short poem

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Thoughts that are the result of fear,

hamper the thoughts of hopes and cheer!

Not in your hand,

Not in your control,

but tame them before they take hold!

See the positive, see the right

and everything good will

unfold before your sight!

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Anxiety- How to overcome it!

The word itself gives  me anxiety! I have been struggling through this for almost a year now. I obsess over negative thoughts, I feel dizzy whenever I step out of my house. Yes, it is pretty bad! But I am dealing with it and I want to share my bits of knowledge and the things which help me get over my anxiety.

1.DEEP BREATHING

You really need to learn how to breathe through your diaphragm. You can watch videos on YouTube or read about it.  Deep breathing really helps your body when you start to panic. It relaxes your tense muscles and your body gets oxygenated blood.

2. KNOW THAT YOU ACTUALLY CAN’T FAINT DURING THE ANXIETY ATTACK

Whenever you feel that you are having an anxiety attack just remember that you really cannot faint during the attack. It is because when your body experiences anxiety your blood pressure rises and it’s hard for your body to faint. you faint when the oxygenated blood cannot reach your brain. In other words you need low blood pressure to actually faint . during an anxiety attack its the opposite. So this might help you next time in overcoming your anxiousness. More

Overwhelming Memories?

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There is nothing in the world which can be compared to the smile brought to your face by a pleasant memory. It  feels just as like the breeze which blows over your face in the evening at the beginning of spring. But what if the good memories end up upsetting you? Sadden you? What if you did not want to remember it? What if it brings pain? What if the person with which it is associated is no longer there? And the constant battle you have to fight with reality and yourself. Reality seems hardest to grasp and rationalisation toughest to exercise! The past starts to hover over the present and the probability of past events comes to the fore- wish i had done this / wish i had done that etc. etc.

      It is hard, especially when it was you who had a part in past happenings. It is hard to come to terms with the past which is against your inner most wants, but which had to be exerted because it was probably the right thing to do. Abstractness of this life baffles you. There is nothing which is concrete, nothing which is absolute. Life becomes a relativity of contrasts.

       But i believe this too shall pass. I believe everything happens for good. I believe if it was meant to be mine, it would have definitely be. Living in delusions may seem to be the easiest way out, but when reality strikes it strikes hard. Better if we keep struggling every day… little by little until we reach a point where we can peacefully live with our present and satisfyingly look at our past. Until that happens keep fighting!

Dealing With Negative People

Hmmm, so we all come across such people all the time. The idea is not to let them get into your head and trust me sometimes it gets hard. But hard as it may be you ought to do yourself this favor. You cannot imagine the amount of time we waste giving our attention to such people. They literally suck out our mental energy and this can be very toxic. A few tips to deal with the stress caused by such difficult people in your life:-

1. ANALYZE

You don’t want to spend a lot of time on this. Just get your priorities straight. Letting yourself down for something which someone else said is not what one should be doing. Move on. Get going with what really matters to you.

2. SEE THE BIG PICTURE

Don’t sweat the small stuff. What happened has already happened. Learn from the experience and let it go. Ten, twenty years from now this bad experience is not going to affect you. So its better to only address it and forget it. Don’t pay any more attention otherwise a small incidence will definitely gonna turn into something big which eventually gonna harm you.

3. COMPASSION

Whatever it may be, they are human beings too. What’s the point of living if we don’t learn to forgive our fellow beings who are just like us but with different experiences and perspectives? Remember –

To err is human, to forgive is divine. “

Be a bigger person and have compassion even for the people who are against you. In the end, life comes down to a few moments which define you. Work for those moments and FORGIVE!

I wish you strength and peace and joy!

Life…

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FEAR holds us back from experiencing the true riches of life!
Life is beyond expectations,
Life is beyond sanity
And life is beyond clichés!
Never close yourself,
Life is beyond your reality…

Loving Yourself

Approval, being loved, being respected, being popular proves our worth. I may ask how? But never mind. When others like us, we like ourselves. It is an usual phenomenon which occurs with each one of us. A totally wrong perception dwelling in our heads. You need to first love yourself unconditionally, then only others can love you. No pretence required.

There are billions of hearts in this world and you think nobody will ever love you? That’s irrational! You doubt whether people around you love you? You doubt the love of your loved ones. They love you more than you think. Deep inside you know it. The one’s who actually matter love you, admire you, adore you. Make that love your strength. Rest? Doesn’t matter!

Love someone the way you want to be loved. Never let your inner security be driven by somebody else’s recognition. Your life is your perception. Why not change it for better. Everyday, when you get up in the morning, go to the mirror and repeat these six points to yourself –

1. I love myself.
2. I am an amazing person.
3. I am confident.
4. I am articulate.
5. I accept my imperfections.
6. I am in control of my reactions.

And never ever doubt yourself. Result? You will find that one person who will always love you no matter what.
Accept yourself and the world will accept you!

4 Ways to become Successful

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Let me tell you this, as I am writing this article I am not yet a successful person. But I aspire to be one. I am a student but even then I consider myself somewhat successful. Why? That’s because doing a Master degree is a success for me. I consider myself fortunate. Similarly, every individual has his/her own idea of what it is to be successful. For some it is to be able to follow what they love, for others it is to earn fortunes or getting recognition or having fulfilling relationships. We all want different things from life, don’t we?

But there is one core value required to turn these aspirations into reality and that is Hardwork. Despite knowing this we keep looking for substitutes. There is no substitute for success. No shortcuts can get us there, trust me on that. Besides Hardwork I am going to tell you about four C’s which pretty much all of us are already aware of, but somehow miss on them and which are essential ingredients for being successful.

1. CHOICE

My mantra to live a happy life is to be aware of the fact that my life is a product of my choices. This is very liberating actually. To know that I am responsible makes me more responsible towards myself.
Success is not the result of a single  right choice rather it is the result of  many right choices. And the courage and wisdom required to make those right choices comes from a purpose. Knowing your purpose is the first step towards the life of your choice.

2. CONTROL

If something goes wrong we all know how our ugly side comes out- we complaint, we blame the situation or the other person or our luck. We forget that it is our life and we are in control.  Self-awareness gives us that power of control. I understand that this spiritual stuff is usually out of the comprehension of a common man but just remember this- 

we all have got the power, the force which drives us, the light which illuminates us, the energy which creates us. We do! Our bodies can be harmed or bruised but nothing can harm our being. This acknowledgement empowers us to follow what we truly love and want. We overcome our fears and that my friend is a real success!

3. CONCENTRATION

Despite having the enthusiasm everyone tends to get distracted some time or the other in the way to one’s dreams. It is acceptable but what is  not acceptable is making that shiny distraction a goal itself. People are so caught up in this materialistic world that they have made money their religion. I am not denying its role but we should never make it our reason to live. There are a lot many important things in this world which need your attention, your energy and efforts.

Again I will say this, having a sense of purpose will serve as a tool to avoid distractions. Your determination will be enough to keep you going and all the other things will automatically take up the secondary place.

4. CONSISTENCY

Being consistent is the most important trait for acquiring success in any field. Every human being is provided with same amount of brains and talents then what is it that makes the difference? The answer is consistency. If you start a thing, finish it. Doing a task occasionally will not provide you any results, instead it would be a mere time waster. And beneficial things don’t show results instantly, it takes time. The real test is of our patience. Maintaining our spirits through the times of doubt and being consistent definitely is the key to success.

How to: Self-Motivation

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Some idea, some inspiration or some desire appeals you and you make a decision to turn it into reality. You are charged up and begin with full enthusiasm. You continue it for a day or two or might even for a whole week but after this brief excursion you go back to your previous routine . You are too tired or something more important has come up or you just don’t feel like doing it. This sounds familiar, right? Well these are some of the excuses  we daily make to ourselves on not giving required time and efforts to the goals we want to achieve. After the initial vigour fades, procrastination sets in and it is the real enemy in the way of achieving our goals. That’s right! No other person or external obstacle can affect us as much as this habit of procrastination can. As Oscar Wilde remarked,

“I can resist anything except temptation”.

So in this age of constant distractions it is vital to keep ourselves motivated.

Here are some of the ways to motivate yourself when you can’t figure out what to do

1. Remind yourself – the reason

You set a goal say you want to be a morning person but you just cannot do it. You keep hitting the snooze button day after day in the hope that you will get up in time the next morning. But that morning never comes. In the times when you feel like giving in to the temptation, remind yourself of the reason- why have you set the alarm in the first place. Constantly reminding yourself of the reason will definitely help you focus.

2. Words of wisdom

Reading is one of the most delightful habits one can cultivate in life. Reading good books provides a safe escape from the depressing, overwhelming or even boring life. It gives colors to our imagination. The insight of the author can help us to deal with our own problems. Their words can soothe us. If you come across such lines which strike the chords in your heart, note them down. There are many productive apps like Evernote which can come in handy . Reading these quotes everytime you are in doubt  or difficulty will give you the needed strength and direction.

3. Self-talk

Following your dreams require efforts. You cannot use your full potential in any task unless you are at peace with yourself. Keeping your head clear off the clutter and focusing your attention on the task is the key. To do that you need to be in touch with your emotions. Acknowledging how you feel gives a kind of emotional strength. Incorporating “me time” in your schedule can help you know yourself better. The answers to all your questions lie within yourself,you just need to look inside. So find a place preferably in the lap of nature and spend some time alone talking to yourself. Weird! But it works like meditation.

4. Find a source of inspiration

This personally works for me – watching inspirational videos on youtube. It instantly uplifts my mood. There are so many youtubers who are self-made and can inspire us in number of ways. Whatever they have achieved is because of their sheer strength of will. Watching their vlogs and videos motivates me to be a hardworking and good human being like them. Some of my favourite youtubers are-
April and Justin from apriljustintv, Bubbi from bubzvlogz, Mimi Ikonn  from Everythingluxy, Alex Ikonn from Alex Ikonn and Superwoman from Superwomanvlogs. Indeed, We all should have atleast one such person in our life whom we can look up for inspiration and guidance. You can find them not only in real life but virtually as well.
 
You can also listen to motivating articles on Umano which is a news reading app where articles are narrated by real people.

5. Know that you are in control

Life is a choice. Your life is in your control. This concept is not at all difficult to understand, you just have to be a little more mindful. For instance, It is your choice that you are wasting your time watching tv instead of doing something for self-development. It is your choice to sit around and wait for the opportunity to knock on your door rather than creating one. we are responsible for the life we have. But we as humans fear responsibility. That is why we live in society. We want them to be a part of our life so that the blame can be shared whereas the truth is that our life is in our hands. Nobody else has a share. So be proactive and change your present reality for better. You have the power. Go!

6. Know your purpose

We are here to help each other out, to share one another’s pain and awareness of this fact gives us a sense of purpose. We only like to receive but the real purpose of our coming to  this place is to give. So be a creator. Share ideas, love , good thoughts. Give service, hard work, time  and you will surely leave this world a little better than you found it. Synergy is the most powerful human force. I particularly love this quote from The Bible (matthew 10:8)

“You have received without paying so give without being paid”.

Each one of us wants to leave behind a legacy so why not it be of harmony, love and respect.

7. Be Active

We all have bad days when all we want to do is to lie in bed and do nothing. It is ok to take some time off and get it all together but after this period of halt we must bounce back with full energy. Exercise, move around, travel, meet new people, talk to the people who have good influence on you, change your perspective,be more positive, count your blessings and be grateful. Each night before going to bed write down the things you felt grateful for during the day. In hard times reading this journal will surely breathe a fresh air into your life.

So these are the main things which keeps me going when everything else seems to go wrong. I hope you also find these tips helpful. Please share if you like it. Do tell in the comments how do you keep yourself motivated.

Hoping…( a short poem)

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Hopes, aspirations keep me alive
Keep me going,
Who doesn’t want the best to happen?
Warn you! Hopes are fragile.
They’ll break before one’s knowing.
Let them ripen,
Before they come out,
So that they can sail on the life’s boat,
Strong and stout…

Bigger Question (Poem)

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So caught up in this world-
So weak
I never realised.
So strong
I haven’t realised .
Grand or minute?
What is real, what is not?
Still standing where I started.
Never so afraid, never so
vulnerable.
What is it that we don’t know?
What is it that we ought to know?
The key to live in
this chaos is with us or not?
If we are one why are we
   different.
What is truth? Is it different for
each one of us?
If perception is different then
truth must be different!
Whom to blame then?
Every individual is right!
  Yet why this chaos?
Why this fight?

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